Someone get out the tiniest violin in the world to play for Megan Fox who says that back in school she wasn’t considered pretty. I know, what the what? Looks like Megan Fox appears to be a loner and no one was tripping over themselves because she FUGGIN’ it up at school. Ok this all makes sense because she went to school in her garage and her mother taught her from books that were written by Laura Ingalls Wilder. Oh she didn’t? My bad. Fox takes time to beat her mug with Elizabeth Arden for a few hows to so she is presentable to do an interview for Miami Magazine and describes her teenage self as “abrasive” and “obnoxious”. Gee, you don’t say? That’s different with your 25 year old self, how? I kid I kid! Look even Stevie Wonders is rubbing one out to her in the bathroom of his tour bus and he hasn’t ever seen her so she has got to be kidding. Picture is worth a thousand words so in high she sported obvious bad highlights with some poppin lip gloss and you can practically see the beauty queen pageant crown on her head. She was hideous! In that really pretty flawless way of course before she hit Hollywood and looks like she is vying for a job on the show Who Wants to be American’s Next Top Model Mannequin.
Jason Trawick likes it so much he wants to put a ring on it even if Britney Spears wants wait. Don’t worry it’s not what you think, she has to wait for her stepford wife completion course with the removal of her frontal lobe and serious laser removal so she no longer appears as Georgia of the jungle. Also there are those pesky lawsuits hanging over her head with her ex bodyguard and her Elizabeth Arden, that she wants done and over with before she heads down the aisle in a rhinestone studded track suit. However all this doesn’t phase Trawick who is head over feet for B. Spears and is going to pop the question in Las Vegas, tonight! Brit Brit knows its coming so it’s not a surprise but it will be a long engagement until she feels she is in the right place legally to have a million dollar wedding. Her conservators have given their seal of approval and it’s expected that the judge on the conservetship will sign off. Looks like nothing can stop her now just some personal matters to clear up and botox inject along with the grueling day of leg, eyebrow and bikini waxing. Life is hard when you’re a popstar.